3:40 am: you never wrote back on my facebook wall
Do you realize we just stole 12 dollars worth of quarters each from the office petty cash just to get manicures? New high or New Low?
Dude ur right that IS what a vagina looks like!
Do everybody a favor and GET LAID MORE.
Why is there a case of Coors Light with my address on it?
I'm naked and wearing a cowbell.i love med school.
If youre wondering about the smell, i set your hamster on fire. But don't worry he's ok
they told me if I wanted to live here I had to get an ass tattoo and then they all mooned me simultaneously. ass tattoos as far as the eye could see.
Nvm, he just almost drank his drink from last night, his drink that has the condom in it. Kinda answers my question.
Why do I have a bunch of cash....and your bra.
she's an english major so her sexts are something i look forward to
Is it bad that I'm a 32 year old woman that is so afraid of commitment that a hamster is too much responsibility?
your penis is a great and majestic leader among the penises.
i now understand why vodka
Should I tell him how he got the bruise on his ass or just enjoy his theories?
I was randomly pulled aside to have my bag checked. It had 50 condoms in it.
Randomize
