Just got a blowjob to the theme of Bohemian Rhapsody as the sun was rising. I should just kill myself because ill never top this moment.
i don't remember but I assumed it was bad when I woke up with directions from his house to mine already pulled up on my phone
Bars not open yet, I feel like a desperate alcoholic wandering around outside.
I think he thought he was a gentleman because he bought me the most expensive plan b at cvs
The guy in the next stall screamed courtesy flush and then puked. Bless you Vegas
its safe to say i can delete the contact in my phone "brandon random bus make out" from spring break right?
Were playing beruit winners pelt losers with eggs
How do you say "get out of my apartment" in Spanish. No time to explain, just tell me.
nothing like a call from your drunk grandpa at midnight on a wednesday to ask your parents if you're registered to vote...
We've cranked the heat for blizzard versions of all of our strip games. Come over.
Some older looking guy gave me his card as he exited the train. Hes a pharmaceutical rep. I'm debating asking him for a job. Obv he wants sex but if I can get a job out of this maybe I can offer him more than a cheap dry handjob bc that's all I'm really up for these days
I got in an argument over whether or not I'm a slut. I argued yes.
Whose dick am I looking at? There are too many possibilities at the moment.
You don't feed me, fuck me, or fulfill me.
I should've known a straight guy wouldn't know all the words to Moana
Randomize
