She's JV to your varsity
I really don't want to move...I'm having a motivation problem.
kev is about to show us pictures of the tranny he accidentally fucked last night.
I'll be there in 10
Is it a bad that I spent my 5 year anniversary with my husband texting my ex boyfriend?
If its called oral, why is it so hard to talk?
you were watching a documentary about sharks and wouldn't stop stroking my legs and whispering "what if they could walk?"
i licked the inside of a toilet bowl for $14. i really can't talk about my night.
i think you may have a shot to cock block in a moment. just saying.
Wake up an cock block please bc these are noises i dont ever want to hear again
I remember saying your puke looked like a jellyfish and you got very offended.
Don't pretend you don't want to dance on the edge of overdose all three nights
I sent her a picture of Richard Nixon and said "these are the only dick pics I send".
That tampon felt like a stick in my vagina, I am never making a drunken tampon choice again. Friends don't let friends choose tampons drunk.
My cat is staring at me while I drink my wine on the bathroom floor in the morning instead of attending class. Sorry mom and dad. Sorry cat.
Left Las Vegas at 2:30 am, woke up at 11 AM at a Barstow gas station with the Valet from Ceaser' palace snoring in the backseat and no memory of how we got there. I felt like Raoul Fucjing Duke right then and there.
You know those times when you're sitting down for a while and r like damn I'm sober but then stand up and r like WOAH HOLD UP.
Now the fun stuff starts.
Someone is losing a finger.
Randomize
