My gyno told me the birth control she prescribed reduces sex drive
wats the point then?
I wish I had a waterproof laptop so that I would watch porn in the shower.
It's one of the reasons i'm here, along with emotional support, physical support if you need it, and power orgasms.
I feel if a girl leaves my house the next morning feeling degraded and in desparate need of a shower, then I have succeeded.
I'll pull you in a wagon. You'll have a sash and a crown on and we'll sing "All the Single Ladies"
He makes me wish my vagina was bigger... This must be what love feels like.
No, but its not like diarrhea. i swear its like my intestines had a secret bank account and i just punched in the right pin.
I consider myself to be an upstream bisexual
You're the salmon of the gays...
I had to rub one out before the Shabbat dinner in case I find a nice Jewish girl to fuck me in the bathroom.
Your mother would be so proud
Just drove by where I lost my sausage gravy virginity
He showed up at my apartment drunk with a telescope wanting me to look at the "blown up star" in -24 degree weather, claiming "it's in the name if science"
If I had a penis, I'd want to put it in you. And I'd treat you with respect and pay for your drinks.
It's Scottsdale, it shouldn't be this hard to find drugs.
I just remembered touching your bosses wife's fake tits last night. Thanks again for taking me to your work function.
I smell like Dick and happiness
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