8:17pm: So, How was fun day?
1:15am: So I just woke up in my bed in my bathing suit... I don't remember getting into bed or dinner or anything after slip n slide that happened around five... I'd say fun day was a success
im pretty sure one of the guys i was dancing with at graffiti wrote on my back "you rock". now feel like a danced with a 5 year old.
Please tell me why your entire hallway smells like microwaved condoms.
The moment you ate chicken nuggets out of your purse you were my hero.
Where the hell did i get chicken nuggets from
Tranny group. Dance off. Horse hair and dicks swinging. I. Cant. Unsee. This.
ummm im also counting the $14 dollars I gave the old guy to pay for the cab I called for him to take to the hospital last night as part of ur present.
Then you better bring Starbucks and a box of condoms in the morning.
Oh shit. This is getting real.
Can I just say how funny it is that your "respect" tattoo is right above the bruise from me slapping your ass
You're either getting fucked or a coupon to Friendly's. I haven't decided yet.
I just blew thrown up hashbrowns out my nose. That's the level of this hangover.
I just need some of your time and all of your body.
He struggled for a second trying to unhook my bra and I said "4/10. Novice."
I'm kinda sad I'm leaving the bank. I never got to have rough sex in the vault.
Lol for real, I'm Kylie Jenner "this is my year of realizing things" right now
Taking a shit in a Texas 7/11... not accepting phone calls now lol
Randomize
