I'm surprised I didn't puke tonight
thank you for a lively/lovely evening :)
should have blown me.
I hate this i feel like im wasting my youth here. I should be off hooking up with boys around the world and having awkward next morning convos in different languages!!
So how many shot glasses of coffee grounds make a pot?
Dude how the fuck are we gonna get the lawnmower outta the pool?
I can't figure out how to get this beer bong in my carry on without airport security questioning me as it goes through the x-ray.
Why doesn't he get that I would rather give him blow jobs than be in a relationship?
Did the game of beer pong go wrong before or after the cops and fire department showed up?
HE'S turngign 18teen real soon.k
While I'm on hiatus from the Russian potato nectar, it is my wish for others to enjoy it in my stead.
It's like refusing a bong hit from michael phelps... You just can't do it
It's like that thing with the devil and the angel except one shoulder has orgasms and the other has stuffed crust pizza and depression.
Is banging someone in the national guard considered a state service or a national one?
Slept with the roommate last night and also discovered that she believes in eugenics. I may need to slow down my drinking
It's beautiful. It's what jesusxwants. I should send you a pic of my boobs out of friendship
Randomize
