Lightning struck the tree right outside of her window as I came inside her. I think its God's way of saying go by plan b.
Trying to figure out when's a good time to take acid and not tell anyone and see how long it takes people to notice
I came back and almost ran over two people passed out in my driveway I've never met before in my life
Time is so short and I miss you. (I just watched that commercial where the people all laugh and get older and die.)
We held a candle light vigil outside the jail hoping for her release, until we realized we were drunk in the jail parking lot.
Well she got high, deleted the essay she was working on, and then ordered dominos. We all manage stress in different ways.
That BJ in the bathroom was definitely worth the $20 cover.
i just woke with half a bagel saran wrapped to my phone and a cookie in an envelope beside my head...
i just passed i guy i once let listen to me masterbate on the phone...nyc is not big enough
I gave her two orgasms and then we laid there and she ate jelly beans out of my belly button...that girls a keeper
I love my cat. she doesnt judge when i stumble in my house drunk and pass out on my floor. my dog looks at me disappointed.
I had sex on a seadoo on the middle of the lake lastnight
I'm fairly sure I accidentally saw my dad naked last night
No I didn't say it was safe, I said it was legal. I didn't say anything about it being safe. It's not my fault if you weren't listening properly.
Chasing shots with airborne.. Gonna get rid of my sickness and my soberness.
Randomize
