So me and friend just finished Eiffel towering this girl and sounds great in theory but after the high five has commenced its just a weird threesome especially when you make eye contact with your buddy during the session
and apparently i was drunk enough to follow up with "I'd let me touch your boobs" ... not my best line.
Fine. Just this once and because its veterans day will I send you a picture of my tits. You're lucky I love this country.
you went all the way to UK and still managed to hook up with someone from our highschool...
and now there are teeth marks on my dick.
If she doesn't judge me for bringing my vibrator in the tanning bed, I know she is a true friend.
Walmart at night is scary enough without having to run into people you've slept with
I just want to be able to run around naked and eat grass with no judgments and have people feed me and expect me to sleep all the time.
He stumbled in drunk at 7am, while we were getting ready for work. He poured a bowl of Cap'n Crunch, poured Jack Daniels on it., and said he was having "Captain Jack" for breakfast. I don't know how he's alive and employed. I hope the Cap'n calls in sick for him today.
So do I get to ride the beginning of the November stache or what?
just because you have a nice tits it doesn't make you a magic little snowflake.
My next goal in this relationship is to teach my boyfriend that there are valid reasons to be fear of dolphins completely.
How do you tell a vegan you want him to stuff you like a turkey?
Definitely the only person to buy 2 handles a 2 bottles of champagne & 3 thirties while wearing a fanny pack
There's a little game I've come up with since the mess of a party I had; it's called "tinsel or condom wrapper? (or: what's that on the floor?)"
Randomize