Nights of college: 1. Virgins: 1. Yes.
my coke dealer is running a Black Friday special
I shaved my legs finally. I am starting to remember what my skin feels like.
Just found out my brother beats off to Lauren Conrad. the Hills will never be the same.
No, she passed out instead. I have the worst luck, its like Jesus is mad at me for having the same birthday as him
and she just brought her bike into the shower with her
I hope the dean has a raincoat on because I'm prolly gonna throw up on him when I get my degree
Your texting shows a blood alcohol level of .12
It's 11am on 4/20 and I'm already in urgent care.
And for some reason I just want to have sex with EVERYTHING
i dont know how he's 22 and thinks emoticons will get him laid. lady boner just died.
He just whispered "doors are weird" and then laughed so hard he fell down the stairs.
I was giving him a handjob in the woods and a family walked by
I just woke up butt-naked in bed with a guy I've never seen..I reached into my bag next to the bed to get my phone and found a bag of shrooms, a handle of vodka, and 600 dollars that I've never seen. what do I do
enjoy it.
MDMA, margaritas, mashed potatoes and ice cream aren't keto Kristin
Randomize
