i just went dwnstairs and there are 5 guys without their shirts on hugging each other. i think i should leave now
I think we should boobie trap our beer this time using duct tape, rubber bands, seran wrap, and urine. Trust me I have a plan and it will work.
my math teacher staples burger king applications to failed tests
New favorite sorority...they made me pancakes in the morning and welcomed back the walk of shame girls with a round of applause
someone needs to get her out of the garbage can shes never gonna forgive us for this
New drinking game. Every time Romney and Santorum switch leads, take a shot.
....this is what your political science major is getting you?
There is a really great story behind the missing Coco Puffs and vodka mystery
And then he serenaded me with "Pimps don't cry" from 'The Other Guys'. If that's not love I'm not sure what is
I spilt beer on the table, and she quickly got a straw and yelled party foul and made me drink it.
And I'm determined to make an Eiffel Tower happen sometime. I just don't know who will take the pic (first world sex problem?)
I just realized my new apartment is at the corner of Patrick Henry and Mary Jane.
Give me weed or give me death?
Anyway. I unfriended all of these people like a grown up and I am never talking to them again
Hey man, when I left for work she was laying on the couch naked cuddling your keurig, can you clean that mess up?
It makes me feel all patriotic & free... And borderline diabetic.
We need some Captain and Fanta. That shit will change your life. Sidenote, bring an IV drip to hook me to in the morning
Randomize