Kanye's agent is the only person whose job sucks worse than mine.
there needs to be a build-a-bong store...
let me put it this way. im never saying "join in or get out" again unless i know whos in the room.
on the way to the hospital you kept asking if we could stop at the bar first. then you proceeded to puke out the window
Whoever decided it was a good idea to sell 40's at a bar with life-sized jenga deserves a nobel prize.
she looks like one of those semi-pretty girls that turns into a 9 while she's riding your cock like she's trying to catch a train on horseback.
And you were like "stop making pop tarts, lil bowow" as you grabbed the pop tarts from your ex and consumed them. Teach me your ways.
Just turned down sex because it's a holy day of obligation, my mom would be proud.
I just had to break into my old house and steal my sex tape. Good times. How have you been?
bring the pregnancy test and the margarita mix, see you in 15
Sorry about my life...
He dated a girl who could do the damn splits on his dick like how do you compete with that
I don't just want drugs. I deserve drugs.
I did what i always do when i miss him; masturbate and watch Bridges of Madison County.
Its one of those days... someone might die
Would a picture of my dick help?
Randomize
