Dude?? where did you go after Wildcats last night? Last I heard you went off with one of the girls we danced with?
Negative - This is his GF, Bobby is in Jail for a DUI. Thanks for the info.
i think i'm in class. and blacked out.
ask if his dick looks like a sausage. alex's bro told me that's a sure sign. btw took pain pills. maybe shouldn't listen to me.
I picked my nose. Flicked it. I heard it hit something. Next thing I know, it's floating around in my wine glass.
So excited for tonight I might actually pee my pants BEFORE I get blackout
Hey can we break in your window? We need to borrow the dog.
Its... i dont even know. theres lots of rap music and i cant find my shoes
I HAVE A GENTLEMANLY VAGINA.
I can't tell if my bong is gender-neutral or not
I'm just gonna eat nachos and wine fruit forever.
I think one of your friend's offered my friend chicken tenders back at his place...just FYI he should probably come up w/ another line
He sent me a picture of his dick as a snake, I'd say things are going great.
I'll give you a blowjob in a Santa hat if it will put you in the Christmas spirit
For the record you're a very classy lady and your love for and mastery of strap-ons is amazing. I would gladly marry you and father your offspring
just showered sitting down cuz standing seemed like too much work, thursdays need to stop making me their bitch.
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