what is the aproppriate waiting time between having sex and playing super Mario brothers
6 min
How the hell can the Olympic committee frown so much on weed and yet put on a show you would have to be high to actually enjoy?
She was covered in mud grabbed my crotch and said see that handprint that means I called dibs
I blacked out after running into my soc TA in the beer garden. came to dancing on the speakers at major lazer and making out with said TA.
No he exists. Who else tells me no matter how drunk I am to pull out. He's watching over me so my bastard doesn't get created.
You asked the waitress what the corking fee would be on the Joose you smuggled into the restaurant.
Would "deck the halls with penises " be an appropriate event title? I know peni is the plural but flow of the tongue as well
just found out I was hugging strangers at the bar last night. there's photographic evidence. I know none of them
NO HOOKUPS IN THE CAR. I will try as i might to practice what i preach, but there are no guarantees.
I just spent a solid 3 minutes trying to figure out how to send a smell through my phone
Just saw a couple chasing each other on lawn mowers. Oh South Knoxville.
He offered me free drinks all night if I could beat him in a drinking race. I blacked out after that but just found his credit card in my bra so there's that.
I just used a coke ridden $20 bill to buy Girl Scout cookies
I love you. You know I enjoy the constant sex noises
so we have roughly decided that hes the dude all the chicks will bang in college, just so he will do their term papers
Randomize
