So is chris hansen cool in person? Or is it just awkward while you wait for the cops?
She just wrapped her tongue around my thumb.....lizard girl may be my next wife.
i want to major in coloring with an emphasis on crayons.
so finals studying is going well?
i just spent 10 minutes talking to the lady who works at taco bell about my romantic situation.
we didnt even make it to the club...the two of us were sharing a plastc bag in the taxi puking into it.
Idk wtf I would do on a date. I thought wed passed that stage at least for a while. Nowadays dates should consist of blackouts and shameful mistakes.
It's not quite a landing strip... It's more like a soul patch for my vagina.
Drinking franzia alone at noon watching a cheese themed episode of "The Chew" I'm ready to admit I need a job.
You were running around yelling "BUKAKE!" and squirting people with a shampoo bottle you found. Total shitshow.
just found out I was hugging strangers at the bar last night. there's photographic evidence. I know none of them
Welp, I just herniated a vocal cord during sex. How was your night?
hi I'm Emily and I thoroughly enjoy getting minors hammered.. I'll start my AA intro just like that.
It's Reggie from Taco Bell, send me a pic.
we've talked on the toilet we're linked now
I would totally suck a dick for some poutine right now
Randomize
