he told me i looked like an animal then proceeded to kiss me
...So a 6 ft tall drag queen in heels I would kill for just told me I have a dunkable ass. I'm confused...but I'll take any compliment I can.
is it a bad sign that i now think of my run-ins with cops as "skill building seminars"?
um, yeah. i think it is.
I just saw a van full of amish parents and their kids. Those cheating mother fuckers!
This inappropriate post strip club text brought to you by Cheetah of Palm Beach and vodka. Blowjob in the champagne room and the clap for the low low price of your paycheck.
He told me to put on my big boy pants, then take them off and fuck her before he smacks me with a chair. His pep talks suck.
This reunion sucks. All the confident hot girls from high school are still confident and hot, and none of the fat girls with low self esteem transformed into hot girls with low self esteem.
we're driving around with this really dirty (unclean and inappropriate) 60 year old ex-san quintin con named old skool d that my brother knows and hes bringing us to get weed. what is montana?
and now i get to think about how i fulfill a gay man's harry potter fantasy. thanks for that
I'm back in the dating scene now... Since the legality issue calmed down. And my stalking charges were dropped.
You don't know true terror until you get stuck in a porta potty while frying your face off.
I witness him finger a girl behind the dj decks yet I'm still going to meet up with him. Wtf is my life
It's like I'm getting a welcome home parade with sex!
It's my birthday, if I want to stay home, get stoned and watch the gameshow network, that's what I'm going to do.
I thought the first time I got peed on it would be by a baby...
Randomize
