I'm scared
There's nothing to be scared of. My penis is average size.
That's what I'm afraid of
bad idea #53- masterbating while on period.
he recorded me cumming with the t-pain app on his iphone
While drunk it seemed like a good idea to barricade my roommate in his room with everything that we could move in our apartment, waking up to him screaming from it collapsing on top of him was just an added bonus.
First day at work... I clogged up the office toilet on purpose to assert my dominance.
Cracked my iPhone screen. Real bad. Girl from last night isn't ugly yet. Stop me if you still think she belongs under a bridge. You have 12 seconds.
I found a pair a guys underwear in my purse that has a British flag on it and says and I quote "British beef" what.the.fuck.
It's like past high you was looking out for future high you by rolling that joint and leaving it in your coat pocket. What a Halloween miracle
Kyle's mobile fuck service..... Kinda has a nice ring to it don't you think??
got into a verbal altercation with Luke Harangoty last night over a table. Called him a cross-eyed fuck and got the table.
Idk maybe I'll talk to him once he gets out of jail just to yell at him and get my strawberry ice cream back.
If you're signed up as "sober sister" can you do cocaine or nah
Kids I used to babysit are now fuckable members of my social media periphery.. Getting old sucks
She used a candle as a shot glass.. A FUCKING CANDLE BRO!!
His mom just pulled off a quadruple cockblock. I'm not sure if I'm mad or impressed?
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