wakey wakey hands off snakey
btw, but what hole was i in last night? wanna know if i have to worry
We had sex in his tahoe, talked about how we don't love each other and then high fived twice. Best Day Ever
i kept drunkenly begging people i met to be in my facebook mafia
The stories of what you did in Cuba got home before you.
Threw a lawn chair at the neighboors dog. I think I killed him. Come here and assess this
Welcome to texting with Mike. You're now leaving the sober section and headed to our insanely high bad decision making portion of mike. Enjoy the trip.
And the horses in Central Park have blankets. And Rafiki just told me "it is time" in the back of our cab.
Drinking games this Saturday as usual although the ice cube tray game is banned due to last weeks incident
Its everclear night, yall need carbs in your body!
Are you going to eat tacos off the floor again?
after stripping the bed and soaking it with the "pet spot remover" I have, I decided in the best interest of my mattress and our drunk friends bladders, i should invest in rubber sheets.
And two different second-graders said my make up was pretty. It's left over from last night bc I woke up 5 min before I was supposed to leave.
THAT'S MY GIRL
KICKING BUT AND GETTING PEOPLE INTOXICATED
I want to meet people. Preferably ones with penises
Randomize
