we're microwaving frozen margaritas its not the same without u
sex on the roof is not as easy as it sounds
I literally need to be slapped with another cock just to notice it.
JUST SAW MY DRUG DEALER SOBER AND GOING TO CLASS. This is weird, its almost like he's an actual student whio leaves his room...
just spent $80 on an im sorry breakfast from mcdonalds for everyone sleeping in my apartment for being a drunkass and locking everyone out of the apartment at 2am.
In their defense you were hugging a watermelon for a good portion of the trip
It's like she can't drink without using a flambongo
She's the drunk girl with the air-horn and sunflower seeds.
Oh Brad. Your poor brain, always being ignored for your penis and crazy women.
This has to be the weirdest conversation I've ever had sober and in the middle of the day before.
There's a set of buzz lightyear wings in lost and found at work. I just need access to your roof.
We watched X-Files, ate pizza, and he played with my butt. It was a pretty standard Monday.
Sex in a tree, bucket list CHECK!
You guys do the cocaine and I'll do the dishes.
Eventually the conversation shifted (as it always does) to Sex toys.
Randomize
