did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
that shirt you're wearing that says "officially single" makes me think you'll be that way for a really long fucking time.
Her parents hate her and she's on like major lockdown. All her friends are in jail and she has massive pit stains. Dude... It doesn't get much worse than that.
great idea involving lots of fake blood and face paint, call me tomorrow.
Take advantage man but know that every anal bead u drop inside her will make her love u 2% more. It's science
I'd hate to be 100% hetero. Pretty sure they have less orgies
I'm just gonna yell "SURPRISE ME" and see what happens. No way this could go wrong
He told me I look like a librarian today. I hope that means he has a librarian fetish or something
Disregard. He says he said I look "agrarian" today and just proceeded to compare me to Mumford and Sons. Fuck it, I'm going home and drinking
Cause I'll toss Tabasco sauce in his eyes and yell "Cobra attack" and walk away
I'll only sleep there if we can bone on your balcony.
I just want to slap everyone in the face that's happy being sober. Loser.
Now it's a thing. He's kind of a creeper and now he's lotioning me. This is going to turn into a Buffalo Bull situation.
Okay, the good news, found Jared, all IDs accounted for, Jack is meeting us at yours with your requested the delivery. The bad news: Lost Alice, banned from Stages, possibly fucked my TA in the bathroom.
Tomorrow night, I am putting you In my trunk. No excuses we have waited forever for this.
So I heard her yell at him and I went downstairs to find he had lit up each one of my smokes and taken just one drag off each and had em lined up on the table. She says he "experiments" when on Ambien.
Randomize
