I'm laying in your front yard are you home
On imdb the canadians say It's amazing
chick im bringing home just asked our cab driver if she could do a line off his turban. i think im in love - or trouble.
I used a physics textbook to prop her up so she wouldn't choke on her vomit...see I have learned something from statics class.
Just found my toeprints on the glass of his sunroof.
You unbuttoned your shirt and started walking down the center of the road screaming traffic stops for Enrique Iglesias.
made the entire pub sing the british national anthem, puked, rallied, then peed in a telephone booth and have pictures to prove it, taking tourism to another level since 2012.
Sorry, they don't make maternity Power Ranger suits...
Hungover. Have to fix everything I've broken. I'm gonna be very late.
You would be so proud at how green we're being. Re-using last night's jello shot containers.. saving the world one step at a time
Why is my hat full of peanuts?
Don't throw them out, I'm on my way
I snorted xanax while wearing reindeer antlers. Prancer gone wild. Have a merry Christmas.
Like my new perfume? It's a combination of Fireball, sex and bad decisions.
Is there such thing as dick sucking teeth guards?
He's a snuggler. Every time I attempt to make a move to find my bra he reigns me in. Needless to say i could be here a while.
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