Seriously, stop being so datable w your movie/song prefs
dude your cousin who was wearing the skirt wasn't wearing any underwear
gross she's a slut
yea she doesn't shave either
Maybe i shouldn't have told him the key to getting in my pants was double vodka sodas and Nelly's song "grillz."
it feels like my vag is blowing bubbles
Are you for fucking real.? He divorced me just because he got a fucking girlfriend.?!
He felt like a one man threesome
She's "scared" of blowjobs, so she just played with it for a while.
Well someone named our apartment "the eiffel tower" on facebook check-in so I think they know..
sold 4 oz of weed today pantsless. man i love college.
I still can't believe that I ate McDonald's off of my chest in his bed...
Cross faded me is not the classiest.
No not at all haha I wish there was a picture of that
Tequila Tuesday.. tonight is the night I defeat the liquor.
I have class at 8:30 and I am not bailing you out of the drunk tank again.
I just had to explain to a 5 year old why I had fuzzy handcuffs hidden in a macaroni box under my bed.
He told me to leave him behind and bury him in his batman pajamas. So two lessons I guess, don't give Tom whiskey and don't touch his daddy issues with a twenty nine and a half foot pole.
he's not even weird he's been offering me different drinks all night
oh i remember now hes the guy that liked when i peed on him
...this is why fuck buddies should be only for grownups.
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