No, I don't think Michelle is a squirter. And if I've had anal sex, the Obamas have.
He used his one phone call to tell me not to let anyone drink all his vodka until he could bail himself out.
I JUST SAW A SIGN LANGUAGE CATFIGHT
good news: I made it out of bed and into shower. Bad news: I made it back to bed without clothes. Worse news: I don't know this bed.
Look at my eyebrows in this pic! We deffo need to go back to that waxing place.
You have a cock in one hand and a shot in the other. Your eyebrows are not the topic in need of discussion.
im destined to be single forever. i hope its okay if your kids come and hang out with my cats.
You almost set me on fire last night.
You probably deserved it.
Actually, what with the curvature of the Earth, it's faster to leave from Washington. And Google maps recommends kayaking instead of swimming.
It was a fight. Me vs nature and drunkenness. And nature won. Big time.
This is what you sent me from the other side of the pool, "Idk but thers a pool n l wanna get naked take off my trunks ill paddle with my dick"
Hopefully this dress says "let me rent your house" and not "let me suck your dick for money"
Was considering going to moonshine but I think I'm just gonna stay home and drink beer because there is no law against partial nudity here.
Please don't pee your pants in the cab. One more time, and im pretty sure the cab companies will refuse to pick you up anymore
I think if I send him enough nudes, he will buy my plane ticket.
Well I've decided to refuse to conform to society and be naked the rest of the day.
Randomize
