Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
Today a TA in one of my classes told me he thought I was 35 and going back to school as an adult learner. Alcohol is working me.
She was wearing a "Got Beer" hat and your bed had necco wafers all over it the next morning. Another story for the grandkids.
She made me cum so hard I couldn't hear for half an hour after
One of us needs to be functional tomorrow and it won't be me. I'm drinking liquor out of a fishbowl.
i told him i should keep a toothbrush at his house for after all the times i threw up there. he said yes but i wasnt getting a key to the apt
I told her I had the flu when in reality I did way too many drugs last night, haven't slept and don't want to sit through a 3 hour buisness meeting trying to figure out which voices are real and which are in my head
Yeah.. he went to Tebow in the middle of the crosswalk and got hit by a cab... The yellow ones really don't stop
I just took a shot out of my supervisors unzipped jeans. Our staff parties are getting a little too personal
Ok now a guy in a winnie the pooh costume is grinding on some chick to the song shots
All I want is to send a text that says "i slept with someone while wearing nothing but purple argyle socks this weekend." But the only person i would send that to is you. But you already know. Because they were your socks.
This is exactly why you shouldn't bang your bartender. Although the awkward free shots are a plus.
having flashbacks of licking salt of your dick for my shot of tequila
She bruised my penis again. But, trooper I am we kept on going.
Gatorade without vodka just doesn't taste the same
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