Dude, I don't think I'll ever be able to find a girl for me...
Is this the gay conversation?
wtf. i just found you're porn stash.
u like it?
NOT THE POINT.
I wont be hard to find. Im wearing a darth vader mask and I have a megaphone.
hey remember that 14 year old i met 5 years ago who i said i would bang 5 years from then?
Yup.
Just curious... Do you still have the cocks bracelet? You know, the one we pass around to whoevers been the biggest slut recently?
I am as serious as getting herpes in Mexico...
What do herpes have to do with anything?
accidentally stumbled into a construction site at 3am on the way home. The bulldozer was locked so we had to settle for rerouting traffic with all the orange cones...
Please stop using me as a reference for bail bondsmen.
Do you have any pictures of me mounting animals that aren't on Facebook?
Literally got mad at him this morning because we didn't have time to have sex for a third time. I think I'm getting greedy.
Definitely broke my toe and messed up my knee walking back. Drink hitch hiking should never happen again.
I was less embarrassed asking him to torrent the teen mom's porn. I'm not gonna ask him to about season 4 of PLL.
Yeah but him not going to be sleeping in your sink this time.
The stripper was super into me until she pulled out my tits then I realized.... This bitch is just using my ass to get MORE TIPS
The air tonight was full of shame when we saw each other.
Well if u wouldn't have had sex on the front porch last night I think that could have been avoided.
Randomize
