We tried having a conversation with our noses.
he asked if thats how we do it in the states..like there's cultural difference in fucking between canada and the us..
He thanked me for being "his little blond pogo stick last night". Good thing?
Almost accidentally stole a baby... explain later
I'm not 100% sure, but I think someone gave me a bath last night...
As I was going down on her I noticed she had a tatoo on her inner thigh that said "Eat it like your birthday cake".
the table of underagers at this wedding were seated 10ft from the open bar. currently 30 open containers on the table for 5 people. dinner hasn't even been served yet.
My tits are coming out a minimum of ten times
He's not letting me leave till I cum. I am a hostage to my own vagina
Good news. That bum you thought that died is alive.
You may be fancy. But you'll never be having cheesy garlic bread and scotch at 3am fancy.
I was on top for a full on make out when in dead silence "I'm moaning Myrtle" came from the TV. Moment ruined. I got cock blocked by a fictional ghost
Do you have feelings for this penis?
I legitimately just had to leave work because I am too hungover. The front office ladies keep making fun of me.
I bonged champagne. And did keg stands. What in the actual fuck am I doing with my life?
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