member when we used to take shits together before volleyball games?
Apparently on the way out of the ER i asked the nurse to doggie-bag me some more morphine.
I hope as the only other living being in this apartment you can explain to me why the toilet was full of cheerios this morning.
My favorite part was walking in the bathroom, you fixing yourself in the mirror, calling your reflection a fag, then throwing a haymaker into the paper towel dispenser before going back out to the bar.
my wrists were so small for the handcuffs, i could slip them off and hand the tow truck driver my keys....
I am so proud of him. After eating the rest of our shrooms, he finally registered to vote
Yea he called the cop officer fonzarelli and asked him if he was mad because happy days was off the air. Boom, beaten and arrested
My sister was borrowing my phone when the sext came through. She just said "wow. He's got a nice dick!" Then went on like nothing happened. Outed by a dick pic and its no big deal. Best sister ever.
Well. Your father was, shall we say, privately surfing the Internet when he found a video of you and Kevin. This was on a very public website honey.
By the way, Kevin! OMG good catch honey!
Send me a pic of your kids to remind me why I have morals.
They're fighting and it sounds intense. Cross your fingers for their demise
Toss in some raw meat and play heavy metal music. It will insight violence.
Our prom king just sent me a dick pic. I know it's 10 years later but I feel like I've finally made it.
so you 69ed him in the parking lot of your apartment
yah I won't allow him in my apartment
i just ran butt naked down the hall and someone highfived me. i love college.
Well it was okay until he pinned my arms over my head and I found the loaded pistol tucked behind the bed... THIS IS WHY WE DON'T FUCK BOYS IN MONTANA ANYMORE
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