Coming down off exstacy at a church event. Resisting the urge to dance to the church hymns.
McDonalds has hash browns for only a quarter!....how many u want?
All of them
Fuck 8am classes
Dear Jesus I'm gonna throw up through my eyes
dude we gotta go shopping. I made pancakes this afternoon and used them as sandwich bread.
I wrote a list of all my homework due in the next few weeks. I feel I've done enough for tonight.
I'm bringing poparts in case anyone gets hungry. The trek to frat row is strenuous.
Everybody was literally kung fu fighting
you were having sex in the bathroom so i pee'd in your bong water...
had to ask my 13 year old sister if she knew any dealers... she did. it's good to be home.
I will also be strapping forties to the puppies.
this periodpocalypse needs to be over. I need head
I think the pizza guy was in shock..
Well I didn't mean to answer the door only in socks but I mean come on, 4 hours of sex works up an appetite! I WAS RAVENOUS
Why in the hell is there a guy dressed up as a horse passed out in our kitchen.
happy birthday!
Whose the chick running for dorm president promising bigger dicks and softer toilet paper? That’s who I m voting for
Tbh I’m not a vibrator enthusiast
But I am godly
Randomize
