Racial profiling caused me to miss two cabs but the third cabs the charm - he's playing Jesus Music
so how much must it suck for him to know that the penis of his best man has been in his wife's mouth before?
i think the cat found all the blow we lost...
I would just watch. I wouldn't even have a boner cuz I would do so much coke. It would just be funny.
She's been drinking and was roller blading. I'm sure you can do the math
hungover subway ride filled with german tourists and a mariachi band. too early. too fuckin early
I'm not sure which one did it but one of them fucked the kink out of my neck
I dont know what we smoked last night but I woke up and found out I started writing a book called White Trash Princess. Its the best thing Ive ever read
I'm gonna fuck that sweet little pussy of yours into absolute submission
Wow. Sorry. As soon as I sent that I felt inappropriate. But yes. Bring a sandwich after. Lol
We got back from the bar and started watching bizzare foods, which subsequently led to the consumption of large amounts of rancid lunch meat and small insects.
She pulled up to the bar in a limo, wasted, and alone. Gets out, shrugs and slurs "I couldn't find a cab" and proceeds to take a shot.
I'm in love.
being single and having a boyfriend 300 miles away is eerily similar. never skipped a beat eating hot wings in my bed with no pants or masturbating every day.
I would do everything over again, except the fireball.
she was concerned about my dick piercings.
Three times. Three times I left home yesterday in search for sex, and three times I returned un-orgasmed.
Randomize
