Come on, it shouldn't be that hard NOT to suck someone's dick
It smelt so bad when i tried biting off her underwear that i didn't want to touch with my mouth
She made fun of how I walked so I announced to her boyfriend that I have cum on her face before.
In hindsight buying the pill crusher with my vicodin prescription might have been too much.
the girl in my class has a rolling backpack and just told it to stay. im too hungover for this.
She is feeding us popcorn out of her bra
at 6am he came into my room and kicked me in the stomach. when i finally got up he was passed out in my hallway and the bathtub water was running
Sorry I kept grabbing your vagina at the casino. I believed it was my lucky unicorn to win bonuses
It's pitch dark except for the glow sticks, someone turned the heat up as high as it would go and the bathroom is flooded. Also think I just stepped on someone's face.
You want anything?
Gatorade and you naked.
I shouldn't be that hard, but i cant exactly put "a guy to tie me up and fuck me and then brush my hair" in my dating profile
No, it wasn't really a sexy 'I'm going to go masturbate.' It was an 'I'm going to go masturbate' that implied I was going to drink a tall boy of Mikes and cry while I looked at lesbian porn.
The police report said i was screaming at someone that wasnt there, then the cops told me to call someone sober and i called mike to tell him "They are trying to arrest me for stealing information from the FBI" at that point they took me to jail.
we were clicking our heels together saying theres no place like home, while the cops were tellin us to call our parents and tell them what happened.
Dude someone puked in a bowl n put it in the fridge. I thought it was salsa! Who does that?
Randomize
