I found out 2day that my dad was a stripper in New Oleans.
Sometimes to bang a cougar u gotta play wii With her kids
Just registered some guy for opium withdrawals. WTF opium withdrawals, who does opium anymore.
Had her hockey skates on in the house. Whole floor is ruined.
so the last visual we have of him for the next 87 weeks is him outside on the ground rolling around yelling I HATE BLOWJOBS
we should hire that guy that makes pancakes that we met last weekend for our next party. He can feed us, and regulate!
I mean two cocks this time. Trust me, I'm not gonna pull the same stunts as last time in this situation
Go big or go home. i snuck in two beers in my bra. im here to win.
A guy is going to be inside me and I'm gunna start singing "I am stuck on your penis, cause your penis is stuck in meeee!"
Apparently, "please don't I have to be in court tomorrow" is not a valid excuse for a girl to abstain from giving a massive hickey.
"willing to pay anyone fun whos willing to hang out and laugh at my jokes while my friends are MIA" is this to desperate?
You know your night is done when the police confiscate your bra at high school basketball game
Bouncer came into the bathrooms to tell us the old one-person-per-stall rule, realised it was two girls banging, and left us to it. Lesbiperks.
Ate his Chinese food and drank his beer and played with his chihuahua. All while wrapped in a towel while he was sleep.
Grandma is high again and locked herself in the house
Randomize
