Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
i stuck my finger in my ass and it felt weird. but you know. it should be different when a guy does it right?
What?? I'm covered in blood at the hospital, I atleast deserve a pic of someones boobs
I feel like I'm in a bed a bagels and mistakes.
God gave him joint rollers for hands
i honestly don't know why someone didn't cut me off after i broke the ceiling lamp with MY HEAD
Learned my lesson. Pink pantydroppers out of a beer bong=deceiving
just thought you should know it took me an hour and a half to make soup. I had to keep laying on my kitchen floor. being 21 is hard.
The best part of tonight is drunk commenting on my moms pic about how birds just want to give you diseases and pluck out your eyes
I have no idea what that means but I'm googling things just so I can watch my thumbs move
I feel like I should throw some tampons around my workspace so everyone will know what's really going on
When that bartender tried to tell us he sang like Sade, I knew it was time to go
Pretty sure by 1p, she had fucked all of my bodily fluids out of me. I'm now trying to replace them with bourbon so 2016 is turning out pretty good.
No more bourbon. Sleep now. I may die. Pray for me.
So how was it?
The cemetery or the sex?
Randomize
