i'm going to rape that little man
omg not your brother
So, how do I go about conveying: I'm sorry, yet very glad she is having my abortion. Via text msg?
I feel like I should come with a warning like "Orgasm free since 1983"
there is beer in every square inch of this apartment and he hasn't even lived in it for 24 hours. we're playing some game that involves slamming beer, beer pong and smacking people's cups out of their hands.
I was making out with him, and then his friend randomly took off my pants and started going down on me. My first semi-threesome was a success.
They have a stripper pole on their deck. Normal.
I bet George Washington got SERIOUS head back in his hay day.
It's not that I'm in love with her, so much as I would love to be her lesbian experience.
HE ASKED IF I HAD SIBLINGS WHEN I ASKED HIM TO LICK MY ASSHOLE
I'll be honest, I too would punch the 21 year old version of myself in the face, and then have rough sex with him.
Double check your contract and see if it says anything about sleeping with your manager
Fuck you, dude, I'm not sharing my weed anymore if you're going for the Panthers.
Wow. Ok who would waste Game 7 ticket on kids?!
Poor parenting at its best
Why can't they just let me be the gorgeous cum dumpster that I know I'm meant to be?
Y’all did coke off my Puff The Magic Dragon plate.😂
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