was it more than 30 minutes?
ya
then you're in a relationship
you know that dress I got margarita and puke on? yeah, just returned it.
We are casual work acquaintances that occasionally fuck when the urge strikes. CWATOFWTUS. I know FWB rolls off the tongue better but it is what it is.
admittedly, it's a little weird getting relationship advice from the mother of a former one night stand. but she's a wise lady and she buys me drinks, so i'm ok with it.
She was literally passed out in a cubicle with a flask in her hand. I LOVE finals week!
I HOPE YOURE READY TO KICK SOME SERIOUS ASS AT TRIVIA NIGHT TOMORROW NIGHT. also, i hope the birth of your niece goes well. BUT MOSTLY TRIVIA NIGHT.
We got a kitchen table so we would eat together more. So far we've played drunken monopoly and had sex on it.
I'm crying at a bar by myself drinking a pear martini drawing things dicks are scared of. How was your day?
I feel like it went downhill once I decided we should take $100 tequila shots.. oops lol
Oh great. I guess I'm second on that list now that we've confirmed she's not a lesbian AND that was her sister.
There they were doing the deed on the beach, looked like two seagulls fighting over a chicken bone.
First night of sleeping in the same bed, and she farted on me. I immediately excused myself and went home. Don't know if we're still together. Will update you.
Should I tell him how he got the bruise on his ass or just enjoy his theories?
He just brought a live lobster to the party.
It's barely past noon, how am I already talking about double penetration
Randomize
