Confirm your location. A cross street is best, but if google mapping yourself is your least-shameful option go for it. ps- going through his mail for an actual address is always an option.
as evidence of my kitchen this morning my night involved alot of mustard and condoms
The freshman next to me just said "I was rocking out on my way here to Dave Matthews..." I wish I would have passed this class the first time.
We have a drunken confused pantless man in our apt. Boots.
I'm currently sitting on the floor of a hostel reception area taking swigs of straight vodka, singing with people whose English doesn't go far beyond Lion King songs. I thought you might appreciate it.
I've had to much cheese to give a fuck about anything. im tired.
they have a video of him in his boxers making a snow angel in the hallway is his own vomit and coca cola.
im actually so stoned and hungover i feel like a bag of jello stuffed into a human shape
That is NOT what pussyfooting around means. Try that again with your toe and I break it off.
How was the picnic?
We played softball, except our team sucked. In one hand was a mitt, the other a beer.
Why didn't you put them down?
No beer left behind.
For an hr, you were convinced you no longer had a right arm so you played Super Mario Bros with just your left hand vs Beth. You won btw, mite b why she refused to wear the unicorn head
what's your room number? I've never been there sober...
I love you but this is the first Saturday I have ever spent at the police station. And where are my boxers?
Kid walks in and orders 24 Mcdoubles and 14 large fries, as he's handing me the money he tells me he lost at rock paper scissors so he had to do the munchie run.
We're like a married couple, but we only have sex on college holidays and other people's birthdays.
Randomize
