Nevermine. I'm just going to tell you on Myspace with a glitter graphic.
(917) i just came from walking.
haha you just came from walking?
official worst smell ever. a used condom that has gone through the dryer.
you two started sword fighting with 3 ft tall spruce trees you pulled out of planters
Used a cardboard box as a pillow and a towel as a blanket. Its like the great depression over here
pregamed for the floor meeting. so stoned. i keep thinking my RA is shrinking.
Show him your tits if he says no
They're not help-me-out-of-jams tits. They're I-fake-people-into-thinking-they-look-good tits.
I'm 11 for 13 getting drunker than the person who's birthday it is
Just ran into a client at a sex shop. The meeting tomorrow is going to be really awkward as we both try not to picture each other using vibrators or role play costumes.
Your loyalty to the Redskins reminds me how no matter how much I disappoint you, you will still always be rooting for me.
My day went from bad to worse when I realized I puked out my second floor window last night.
And then I went through the chix filet drive through for breakfast in all my republican post sex glory
He was cute in a Sketchy-trying-to-sell-you-a-vaccum-at-9-at-night kinda way.
I just saw a chick driving drinking a juice box smoking all while on the phone that is talent
Rich men love me! I remind them of their trophy wife!!!
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