Bea Arthur died! :(
What?
Big bird passed.
i just want to meat her and do terribly wonderful things to her vagina...
No see this is how It goes: guys will fuck virgin girls. But girls don't really want to fuck virgin guys. So you're good have no fear.
He's pole dancing on a heat lamp.
He said to me this morning that we should finish these beers, go and get plan B then on the way back, go to the pub to celebrate the death of our baby. I love Manchester.
Chasing a shot of svedka with a clementine is NOT the same as tequila w lime...
Just sponge bathed with a swissper. Thrush inevitable. Shaking.
Does having a sippy cup full of wine, at an outlet mall, qualify you as 'having a problem'?
It's now 8:05 on a Wednesday night and I'm already going home with my bra in my purse.
She just asked what would happen if you put a vacuum in your butt and turned it on. These are our conversations.
DOUBLE NIPPLE PIERCINGS ARE HORRIFYING
Somehow reaching for the flaming hot cheetos ended up in the best sex of my life
She's sent me the same nudes using the same gestures and positions... It's like she has a template for her sluty-ness
i need to get drunk because i'm an angry sober
Sorry you ended up in detox. It's not my fault you decided to walk downtown in only your underwater at 3am. I think the tequila took over.
Randomize
