Need sex. Gaining weight.
best part, i was ridiculous and none of them were judging me bc they didn't want my vagina. it was like i was a pretty painting
I realize now. I should have just made out with everyone and anyone when I had the chance.
having sex with you is like teaching a dog to tango, it DOESN'T work
So. Camera broke because I tried to wash it under the sink, kristi had to take me home and I woke up to my computer showing me that I googled how t take more than one shot at a time. I'd say the night was a success.
my momz letting me make the christmas card in photoshop
so that means christmas in space?
imma make our dead cats ghosts like obi wan kenobi
I specifically found a fat girl to lift me up on her shoulders.\n\nIt was glorious.
Dude I was taking a shower and I kept looking down at the drain expecting Mario to come up, yell "It's a me, Mario!", tickle my balls, and go back down the drain.
I'be color coordinated the clothes in my closet and my underwear drawer. I'm like an advertisement for house arrest. Help.
But seriously, I hug most of my drug dealers.
Texas State Troopers call you ma'am even when they arrest you for public nudity and after you've puked on their cruiser. Country boys raised right.
Ill go to bed but tamed sharks isnt so much of a bad idea. Not for riding
You blew him?!?!
*Am blowing
And I keep taking breaks to write you back, please stop replying.
Like I’ve seen him completely trashed and I’ve also seen him rip shirtsleeves off with his teeth and I can’t tell if I’m intrigued or not
Happy 20th birthday! I hope you like anxiety and having your debit card declined at McDonald's!
Randomize
