We walked 2 miles, legit 2 miles, and purchased 7 half gallons. One for each of us. Intense
Today my mom told me "that's what worries me about you getting blacked out drunk... You don't look pretty"
i broight you flpweers amd vodka. open yoir bask door
All I know is I was dancing to Shakira in his alley and I think rubbing my junk on his car door.
he kept telling me how much his girlfriend would love me while we were making. why does tequila always do this to me?
I will accept it in the form of tooth necklace but if you have better ideas I am open to suggestions.
Remember don't think of it as being an alcoholic until something bad happens.
Think of it as Mythbusters for people who say you're going to get arrested or die
Also my vagina isn't a crater of death where nothing comes out
I'm sort of afraid for my life tho. If the 4th of July can be the way it was a DMX show is capable of anything
hell no. i was not wasting my two tears of virginity on him.
I feel like I put a fire out with my hand but idk if that was a dream or not
There's no triumph quite like finally banging your high school boyfriend 6 years later
And you know what the worst part is? Because of him I can now relate to a goddamn Taylor Swift song. FUCK. MY. LIFE.
I am become drunk, destroyer of all worlds
high I am. I am yoda. Yoda I am
Randomize
