If immigrants and dwarves find love, why can't I?
At the bar. Guy comes up wearing a hollister shirt and says "lets blow this popsicle stand"
You fucking left with him didn't you?!
You litterally reached into some girls shirt, pulled out her tit and yelled whats up with this guy.
Two girls down stairs, two girls up stairs and....
We've got ourselves a situation
I told him we couldn't have sex because I was ovulating and "I come from fertile people."
yes we did fuck in his chapter room. yes it was demeaning. and yes, they probably will discuss it at chapter tonight.
I think i just threw up blood. i can't chill right now;
I think I shall call his penis Gatsby. We talk about it all the time, but I never see it.
Today wasn't Sunday Funday, it was more like Sunday god is taking a shit on my life day
I feel like I'm going to get the reputation of being the girl who brings her dog with her to all her random hookups.
And THIS is why we get drunk. No good story, documentation, or event happens by eating a salad. Alcohol consumption leads to good things
Between the uncertainly of my bowels today, and the distance the bar is to my house, remember I am doing this for you and our mutual appreciation of alcoholism.
It's volleyball. Just do it. You want to look sporty. Save sexy librarian for another day.
Masturbated while waiting for my face mask to dry, so it was a productive night.
It's not a hangover, it's "slept on a couch with another person and said person moves a lot and is loud"
Randomize
