The best part was that when i tried to chase her she ran off in one of those barbie motorized jeeps that little kids use and i chased her on a big wheel, thru lincoln terrace
His internet searches, listed chronologically: sex slave, volunteer sex slave, lava
I wish you could see the look on my boss's face right now.
wtf?
Before you passed out in the middle of the NHL 10 party you had to prove that you were a better fighter than Patrick Kane. Your not. Thanks for the black eye dipshit.
So apparently last night I was running around columbus circle station screaming that Obama was a pussy and that "waterboarding should always be an option" lol
You said your dick dragged you up the stairs
Apparently I also called my credit card company to demand a credit limit increase. I'm so content with not drinking another 60 days
I just want you to sit on my face and to tell you you're pretty. Most girls would leap at this opportunity.
My goal for tonight is to swipe my debit card through those weird rolls on the back of a big bald guy's head.
my boss just accepted "because it's 4/20" as a legitimate reason to take Friday off
MASS TEXT: Lets start a new tradition. Black Friday log pic contest. I'm waiting.
Opening beer with my teeth is getting easier the drunker I become.
It turns out my teeth are bleeding.
I am very happy to share that the hospital says the testicle pain is normal and that they are going to take care of it.
i dont know the whole gay terminator look is really hot on him
What a way to start the day. Staring at penis for 3 hours
It's pretty much my favorite thing ever
I like how I can go from sucking dick in the my basement to singing along to veggie tales with my family in a span of 10 minutes.
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