That's the secret to virgins: blizzards.
I'm scared at the amount of beastiality in this conversation.
Bring more bourbon. Day drunk just hit another level.
You're just jealous because you lost me and I ended up at another party licking Marshmallow Fluff bikinis off of lesbians.
My fuck buddy is great and all, but it gets weird when she gets in arguments with her BF in the driveway
Btw. U, me, male strippers, beer. Gonna happen. We could totally get TNT from like u know TNT places
I slept naked with a towel wrapped around my waist in case I pissed the bed again
I fucked him while wearing his hat. I love the navy
And let me tell you, getting your ass waxed is the weirdest fucking experience.
The main motivators in my life are my sex drive and spite
It began the way the best stories do—with some naïve jackasses in a place they had no business being at.
I'm literally the definition of crunk, sunburnt, and dehydrated. I'm going to die tomorrow.
I cannot pick him out of a line up. I remember he is blonde and his half flaccid dick looks like gonzo. So unless he pulls down his pants I don't know who he is
Listen, i know this is weird for you, but as your fuck buddy, id prefer if you didnt fuck her.
Youre asking too much from me
You spilled your drink, and we laughed so hard my boobs popped out of my shirt.
Randomize