Umm I'm too high to move.
Ok seriously, can we bring back badminton?
I may have discovered that porn hub is on my top visited sites during class this morning.
We made the pizza boy do Jell-o shots with us. He didn't even deliver to our house, we just called him over from the neighbors
after we were done she whispered to my dick "you sir, are a genius"
I guess all those years with her as your babysitter finally paid off.
Maybe he'll be famous someday and I can forget that anything embarrassing may have happened and just say that I fucked that famous guy.
Here is a brilliant idea passed on from men who have that same regret. WEAR A FUCKING CONDOM ALWAYS.
shes making a cheerios necklace using dental floss 'just in case' she gets the munchies later
IM FEEDING MY CAT ALL THE HAM
At Walgreens. I'm getting condoms and a bottle of water so that I'm not "just getting condoms". I don't think I'm fooling anyone though.
I've only hooked up with engineers this year and it may be the best future financial decision I've ever made
- I'm finally learning to be functional when I'm high. I feel like this is a milestone.
I think he fucked my hip out of place.
I think we might need a safe word for this...
Pretty sure my aunt hooked up with one of my brothers frat brothers at his graduation party
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