I totally have a Rabbi on speed dial now. Keep it Kosher.
i thought he was 22...he said he was 25..he was 19...im 26..it doesnt count if you dont know right?
i don't think you understand, blowjobs are like flowers for guys.
I think jizz is working it's way to becoming my number 1 food source.
Passed out for 3 hrs til now to wake up naked on my bed covered with grass from drunk slip and slide I would call that success
So when I got her home I realized being a lesbian again isn't like riding a bike...
I'm not really into her personality. Not that we've ever looked for personality in women.
That's only a quality to look for in a second marriage.
Yikes. I usually have a 24-hour waiting period between sex partners. You know, like for a handgun.
I've wasted nicer days than this hungover and dry heaving in bed.
Remember when puke and rally meant a good time? Fuck pregnancy
A sexy devil squat down and peed in front of Tom Hanks from Castaway.
I'm sure as hell not getting hoodwinked into going back to rehab again
Omg. I meet up with you guys with bodily fluids on my chin ONE time and suddenly I'm a whore.
I woke up this morning to pee and six dollar bills fell out of my underwear. I guess that lap dance just bought me lunch.
it will be a surprise...all I can say is stripper clown.
Randomize
