No, computers are like whores. moody bitches that cost too much and no matter how much protection you have you can still get a virus
apparently, "please pick me up from the airport" also means "i got drunk on the flight and need to give you roadhead in broad daylight"
All my problems are solved. I just got McDonalds and scratch off lottery tickets.
i didnt mean to paint the dog... it just kinda happened
and i do it all in one night. I'm like santa but a whore.
Duuuude. Everything is so brilliant right now. This frosting is freaking orgasmic.
It's vanilla, man. Accept no substitutes. There are so many t's in that word.
I just heard "I just let you finger me on Megabus, I clearly don't have standards".
Holy fuck, spaghetti burritos are the best idea I've ever had.
Basically as long as the fan is pointed at my vagina i can cool off enough to sleep.
Oh we will ALWAYS be together. Or I'll have to delete my Facebook altogether. I've drunkenly boobie trapped photos of us into every album. There's no way I'd ever have the patience to go through that deletion process.
Fuck I keep finding new battle scars from our fight. Justin told me I stabbed you with a broom handle.. Do you remember ripping my pants off?
We dared each other to drink Arbor Mist, and I waterboarded someone with tequila.
Did she owns a vibrator that will set off seismic activity.
If I can ever get control of my legs I will be home. Thanks... and again sorry about your bed.
If my emotions are below a 3 or above a 7, I'm crying
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