There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
I think you're the first person to ever call Louisville, KY a "romantic getaway".
love makes seman taste better
They're sharing a mixed drink at a bar with straws...its like a disney movie with booze
Leaving ole miss girls house to go to the stripper girls house. Why did it take losing my job to start getting laid all the damn time?
Look I know it's late and I hope this doesn't wake you up but I feel like you should know that I'm sleeping on my couch in my own apartment so that my friend can get laid in my bed, and I would do the same for you.
I am going to wait until he wakes up to set his couch on fire and then pee it out. That way he knows it was not an accident.
what kind of one night stand wants to walk you home in the morning? whole diff kind of walk of shame.
That's like being smoked out by a unicorn. If the opportunity presents itself you fucking do it and don't ask questions.
I gave him head in my cape. On the kitchen floor. Watching a show about bacon.
I woke up in a trash can. Please dude. I don't know what I did to you last night, but I'm sorry. Epically sorry. Please call me back. Please.
If I had your job the next day id be on the news. And not the good news. Like fox & friends. Nancy grace would have my ass.
I left myself a note saying 'buy a hamster but not an orange one like this pen'
omg so drunk
I really have to stop going to the movies high. Spending $10 to not know what the fuck is going on is starting to get pricey.
Wrong Cuomo but I had a dream last night in which I was very sexually attracted to Chris
Randomize