why am i having a flashback about somewhere we were this weekend with music videos playing? Spike jonze brothers place?? Help me out
this is two weekends in a row I've been the pantsless girl at the party. I love my social life.
I'm pretty sure my penis yawned halfway through. That loose.
This went bad. Everyone is crying, i dont know why and I am really uncomfortable.
From what I remember, he had one ball. But it was cute
She's doing shots in her underwear, a fur hat and mittens. I'm never coming home.
Less talking, more tequila
Dear Derek. I would like to offer my sincerest apology for the 2 to 6 text messages you are about to read. Also for the 15 minute voicemail, which may or may not have sent. Sincerely, Sober Katie
This must be what defeat feels like to Tom Brady today. I bet he wishes he could barf up all of his bad decisions from yesterday, too.
Overall win. We all know who got to sleep on the concrete outside of Denny's with you.
So I've decided to grow a vagina forest. Because I'm single and it's like a zen garden. Brings a new meaning to long hair don't care.
I needed that adderall to break my tradition of passing out at the bar on Sundays
I WOULD SERIOUSLY RECOMMEND THE SHIT THAT I AM ON RIGHT NOW
Woke up pants less in the vacant apartment across the hall. It was unlocked because they were showing it to someone. When they walked in I woke up and said "this is a great place to live" and walked out
so in 24 hours i have gotten caught having sex in my car by a cop, almost burnt off my vag, almost got hit by a semi, and got fired. awesome.
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