Guess who has two thumbs, loves booze, and just dug half a handle of rumb out of a trash can in a freshmen dorm? This classy gentleman. Good day to you sir!
I think I gave almost everyone at that party the clap last night
so my class lasted 15 minutes this morning because this kid puked all over himself..only at radford
i've learned that i'm good at stealing things. like live cats.
you should break up with her....give her the gift of reality
Being the only sober one.. I had to feed you guys doritos. You kept licking my fingers.
THIS TIME TOMORROW MY VAG IS GONNA BE BRAND SPANKING NEW.
After my lunch today, I've got $10 till Sunday night. I am losing at life.
I hooked up with a guy that had a beard last night felt like I was building a fucken log cabin
You must be buzzed on Miller Lite.. Zen master advice is flowing
this is gentle reminder #1 not to forget to bring the vibrator when you come
It will pretty much be equal to the feeling I had when you let me hold your dick while you were peeing, or when I graduated high school!
That butt dial turned into a booty call.
You tried to run away last night. The neighbors brought you back.you were in their hot tub again. This needs to stop
She looks like a character that batman would try to kill, or something.
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