I'd fuck her but she fucked Dusty. And I'm pretty sure he's humped livestock
I fukin lobve the states. Girls here let me fuck them because they like my accent. I may not go back
i don't remember but I assumed it was bad when I woke up with directions from his house to mine already pulled up on my phone
She just said she wanted to get freaky and left the room. I'm almost certain I just heard the microwave.
I got laid and laid off at a conference in long beach all on the same day
Eh. They balance each other out
About to go out with the girl of my dreams tonight. I am looking at one of her hottest fb pics, to practice not looking at her huge tits.
NEW INFORMATION meech found me passed out on a bench outside.
Post walk of shame: realized the underwear I put on when I left was another girl's underwear.... woof
I had another sex dream about you but it was very dissatisfying. As you finished you starting singing the star spangled banner. then you left. I was not amused.
You went to the animal party as a hoodrat. You won the most creative costume contest.
How was my night? He had a picture of his mom on his night stand and he yelled "Papi like" when he came. Fuck tequila.
ok give me a pep talk, I want a hotdog but I'm too stoned to go make it
I told my coworker that I'd get him some edibles because he wants to rekindle his marriage. I'd better get some good karma out of this.
In the event that Ian's ex wife asks you, tell her I'm sweet snd innocent. No reason.
I was literally so lonely last night that I stopped watching a video on porn hub and just read the comments
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