Just made ouyt with a dude on the real wporld...I said I dont want my face blired out
Please don't tell anyone I peed on your wall.
I positioned my bed perfectly so around 10 a.m. every morning there are rays of sunshine coming through the window in my room. Now i can tan while PTFO.
We are gonna be 90 years old in wheelchairs at the nursing home sitting at computers poking each other and waiting for the other to die so we will have the last facebook poke.
So I think his penis grew over the weekend. Is that possible or does absence make the dick grow longer?
Lost my key. Fell asleep on the doorstep and got woken up by host grandma poking me with a broom.
Travelers Top-Tip: Europeans do not appreciate being repeatedly referred to as "gypsy" regardless of how good your Borat impression is.
It's just unfortunate. She's a 28 year old woman who looks as if a pelican and ET had a baby. With braces.
I just came inside of a Gatorade bottle. That hungover.
I hope you gays don't get too crazy after DOMA. Gay divorces aren't any better than straight ones.
why does CNN give a flying $@*# about the royal baby so, so much?
i hope they name him Joffrey
As pissed as she was, you would've thought I was trying to get back into his pants instead of his booze collection.
He made me choke him and call him Papi..so all in all a good night.
Let's knock shit down like godzilla and have intense sex in the rubble
I'm high. ignore me
It's such a sad loss when a hot guy finds Jesus and grows a neckbeard
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