That arnold schwarzeneger picture looks strikingly similar to paul
Not half as good looking as paul
I'd say paul has bigger bicep peaks, but who am I to judge
My kitchen smells like failed pina coladas.
I won't be sarcastic... just naked
I couldn't open my car door and for a second I thought they were taking me to an intervention circle.
ughh I puked about 4 times on metro, no one seems to like the cool design I made on my shirt
omg I just had an epiphany about why I grew into such a whore....
HAVE YOU EVER NOTICED WHAT THE SPICE GIRLS USED TO WEAR?!? those were my idols, I never stood a chance
You can't be friends with my side piece. Conflict of interest.
You don't have to have sex with both if us but I would like a little positive fucking regard.
You kept screaming, "Fuck her right in the personality" and then kissed a guy and slapped him across the face
He's hot, you can get laid, and you may get free drugs. It's the trifecta of banging a drug dealer
At least your road beer policy is responsible. Well, relatively speaking.
For a man with no legs he was surprisingly good at doggy style.
I don't know whether to high-five you or stage an intervention.
How long until you're healed?
Physically? A week or so. Emotionally? The scars of dislocating my knee at a frat and flashing my panties to the whole crowd wi never heal.
He had the same tone in his voice and look in his eyes that he gets when he says UFOs aren't real.
Mom saw my dick pic over my gf's shoulder. She told her she really should've had me circumcised.
Randomize
